I haven't posted anything here for a long time. Then my great friend +Jon Acuff (OK Jon and I have the same name "Jonathan" and we are connected on linkedin.com and he liked something I said on twitter @crowemeat if you searching. He has also responded to an email I sent to him) So by today's relationship standards, I'd say we were like BFF's. (I hate acronyms)
Jon said something today that resonated with me. He said that I should do the impossible. I absolutely love and hate writing. I have so many things on my mind that I love to share, so many stories I'd like to share, so many insights on life, love the pursuit of happiness.
I absolutely love storytelling and the way I do it (so I've been told) would be conducive to putting into book form and getting it out there! Without some background info on me its hard to really connect. What I can tell you is that I grew up in a Lutheran church with parents who were and still are dedicated to the Lord and to each other. Married in 1963, far from perfect, but perfect parents for me and my 3 older brothers. I was the runt of the litter, born so far behind that many call me a "perfect mistake" or "oops" or "_______" fill in the blank. My mother knows that is not the case and defends that to this day, if it comes up. My mom says I'm special!
Little known fact outside of my family: I nursed until I was like 4 years old.
Now I know this may come as a shock to our DINK's (dual income no kids) society but yes, you can really have 1 person work (the husband or wife) but in order to make that work you gotta hustle! You can't actually buy any food for your children for approximately 4 years. Just let them drink the mommy milk. They'll be fine. I grew to 6'7" tall and was a rockstar football player in high school and college. I have a successful career, a lovely wife (aka: Treasure) and 3 lovely little kids. By the way, that football career would have gone maybe even as far as the pros (according to coaches at the time) but there were other health issues that I brought upon myself that kept me from getting there. Or maybe it wasn't God's will?? We'll dig into that. Anyway, my point is that the mommy's milk is where its at. I tried to become President of +LaLecheLeague in Minnesota, because of all of the great health, emotional and spiritual benefits of a nursing mother! I want to get the word out! BUT I found out that you have to give women some instructionals on nursing and my wife (and I) would NOT be ok with that! So I am a cheerleader on the sidelines. GO NURSING!
I'm perfect in zero ways. I have had many past experiences however that would allow me to be a great educator in "What NOT to do" to succeed in life! For today however, let's just test wade around the kiddie pool and maybe tomorrow or the next day I'll go for the high dive. Most likely I'll end up belly flopping, but from what I've learned its not always about the form. Its about the fall.
It's about the fall.
That seems like a good line for a blog post. I should write that down.
Since my last post my wife and I have experienced some highs and some lows in life. We moved to a new area within Minnesota, I took a new job in the big city, we sold our old house, which was literally 100 years old, it was made mostly new by our hands, blood, sweat and many, many years and tears.
Many of those tears were left on the floor as we wandered around the rooms where our little ones learned to walk, where we had fights, reconciliations, birthday parties, anniversary parties, sleepless nights with croupy coughs, catnaps with the kids on the couch on Sunday afternoons, powerless nights during thunderstorms and countless friends and family for dinner and special occasions.
Those tears were left there, but also still fill my eyes. Ahh, the good old days. Well, it was just a couple of years. But today is GOOD because its the day that the Lord has made!
As we contemplated the new job through discussion and prayer, we decided that the acceptance would put us closer to my aging parents as well as our brothers and sisters on both sides.
We prayed to find a new church, a new community, for great neighbors and a place to call home. We found all of those things and the way we found them was truly God-ordained. If anyone were to tell me that my God isn't real, based upon how things are working out in our life right now, I'd probably tell them like Francis Chan +Crazy Love that "their mother isn't real!"
We were put into a sermon series at our new church www.quarrychurch.com and my wife and I were told by God that we need to "be open to more children". That was November of 2015. My wife was ready, to grow our 3 kids and that was it. But, God has more in store. So He says. When she heard those words she was pregnant already. We lost the baby in February of 2016. We had lost our daughter Kate, stillborn at 27 weeks a few years prior. We were devastated.
We moved on in life, finding joy in God's presence and wondering what exactly and when exactly more children would be in our life. If at all. But he promised? It was his words? Did we hear incorrectly? Were we both hearing it wrong?
Fathers Day, June 2016. My wife is getting her hair ready for church (now this is a process) so I setup shop on the bed, enjoying the bacon coma that I've gone into after my special Fathers Day Breakfast of bacon, more bacon with a side of bacon.
"What do you think about our family size?" she asked.
"Uh. I dunno." was my reply. I wasn't sure where this came from. We hadn't talked about it in months.
"It was just on my mind." she said.
"Yeah, I guess I don't know. I hadn't really thought about it." I said.
We walk into church and Pastor Michael is preaching on James and our responsibility to take care of widows and orphans.
We were both immediately moved to tears and fought them back during the entire service as we both knew in that moment and from then on that we were to pursue adopting a child. We weren't called to donate money to an international children's fund. We weren't called to donate to a local children's charity. While these are vary noble causes and encourage people to focus on the issues that surround your local community, regarding homelessness and the vulnerability of children and widows, it wasn't what we both knew where we were to put our effort into pursuing.
So, we are in the process of adoption! From India! Whoa! Never would have thought of it. We know people who have adopted and are prayerful, hopeful and trying to be patient as we walk through this process. We are doing our best, with God's help, to abide in the fruit of the spirit as we walk down this path with so many unknowns.
Would you pray for us?
Our background checks have cleared and we are going to be meeting with the financial counselors from the adoption agency and we will be working on fundraising to meet and hopefully exceed the amounts that we'll need to make this work.
We believe that God's hand is at work in this and we are very excited at the opportunity we have to reflect his love, through our trust in His plan.
I'm posting a little bit of my journal and prayer entry I had this morning. I've started sharing with my brothers in Christ, but I feel like I could put them out here too for others to read, see, comment (if anyone ever reads this post!).
God I pray your intimate peace, love and joy placed upon the hearts of those who might read this now. They are hurting, wandering and I pray they would look not up, to you but that t they would accept you and find you within. Thank you Jesus. Amen!
As I read through some of pauls writings on prayer, I’ve
been going back to read through the book of Psalms.. A nod from Pr.
Michael at the beginning of the sermon series as well as a prodding of the
spirit have put me into a reading plan within the book.
Phillipians 4:6
“In nothing be anxious; but in everything by prayer and
supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.”
in everything by prayer and supplication (form of prayer)
with thanksgiving (form of prayer) letting your request be made known (form of
prayer)
In everything, by prayer.
God what am I missing out on because I am not “in
everything, by prayer”? What goodness are you waiting to deliver
but I don’t have because I haven’t asked for it, again and again.
The prayer of Psalm 34:
Verse 2
“ I will boast only in the Lord …”
Verse 6
“I prayed … and the Lord listened …”
Verse 14
“ … do good, search for peace …”
Verse 22
“ … the Lord will redeem those who serve him.”
God help me to remember that all I have is yours. Help
me to show that to others, in my words and my actions. Help me to grow in
prayer, for courageousness, boldness and intercession, in everything, as
sometimes you know I only ask for your insight and help in the final moments
when I think a situation is out of my control. Help me to remember that
you haven’t surrendered your authority! God you know all, see all and
work for my good and to always turn everything over to you. I pray for my
trust in you to be growing in me always as I walk in your goodness and find peace
in your spirit, thank you for your forgiveness and redemption of all of us who
work in your will.
Amen!
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